Wanderlusting

Trogir is one Dalmatian city I hadn’t heard much about before our arrival to Croatia.  It just isn’t on every traveler’s itinerary, especially on shorter visits to the country.  It’s not off the beaten path… most of Croatia doesn’t qualify as such anymore.  It just gets knocked off many ‘must see’ lists for other nearby attractions in the vicinity like Split and Hvar. Trogir is nestled on a tiny island between Čiovo and mainland Croatia, though it is so close you may not even notice.

My Mom came to visit Kurt and I on our journey, and we hopped around Dalmatia for a week, eating Pizze Dalmacija in the November sunshine, dipping our toes in the Adriatic and drinking champagne before noon.  One of our favorite places we explored together was Trogir.

It has no ancient Roman palaces like Diocletian’s in Split, but the medieval Old Town is one of the best preserved in Europe (UNESCO agrees), and I found it even more charming because of the lack of gaudy chain department stores and busloads of other tourists.

 

I’ll be honest - there isn’t much to do in Trogir.  That’s all part of the charm.  If you felt really motivated to accomplish something during your visit, you could wander into any of its churches, go visit the albeit unimpressive Kamerlengo Fortress, or visit The Trogir Museum.  

The real loveliness of the town is found in its relaxed atmosphere and warm red tiles on the rooftops.  Nobody seems in a rush.  Sidewalk cafe culture abounds, and the harbor views and slick medieval stone streets make exploring the maze of Trogir an adventure well worth the day trip from Split.  A perfect day visiting this town includes lunch on the Riva and strolls along the Promenade.

Like most of Croatia’s coastline, Trogir has changed hands quite a bit through the centuries, making its architecture a dazzling mix of influences, from Romanesque-Gothic to Baroque.

The crowning jewel of the Old Town is the Church of Saint Lawrence, whose tower is visible from many spots around town.  
 

Even the view from the bus stop made me want to stay.

How to Get There:

Split’s airport is only a few kilometers from Trogir, and is easily accessible by taxi or bus.

From Split’s central bus station, take bus 37 til the end of the line, and you will be dropped near Trogir’s market.  Ride costs 20 Kuna one way.  

Have you been to Trogir or Dalmatia?  What was your favorite destination?

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Standing there red-faced, eye to eye with Dayna, our bags wide open, clothes strewn about the room. An urgent rush hangs thick in the air as we momentarily pause the mad dash to pack. The crisis – differing solutions to the problem of how to arrive at our next destination.

I opt for the slower, but more affordable bus. She desires the quicker, more reliable and pricier train. On the verge of a fight, at the most inopportune time of times. Our host is about to leave for work. The dilemma is whether or not to get a ride from them to the far flung train station or simply stay and walk to the bus.

 

The resolution and unfolding of the conflict gives insight into how to keep things from boiling over, souring the travel experience or even breaking up a relationship while on the road. From this and other experiences traveling I have gained insights into what can help a traveling couple who is traveling the road of life together, literally.

Golden Rule: Listen

 

Almost with going unsaid the most important rule is to listen to your partner. While this may sound as obvious as putting on pants to go to the store, many a partner fails to follow this simple rule.

Active listening is actually hearing the words coming out of one anothers’ mouths. All too frequently we make assumptions about what our partner means as they speak to us – often fading in and out after the first few words. We know this persona all too well. We know exactly what they will say… perhaps. Perhaps not.

Equally as important, if not moreso is body language. There is so much that goes unsaid, instead expressed in other ways. Someone’s words might convey agreement, while their facial expressions tell another story. How disastrous would it be if you ended up booking a flight with that exotic destination in mind, only to find out your partner had other hopes.

Communicate to Facilitate

Communication is not just a monologue. Listening is only half of the process. Making sure that our input into decision making is clearly understood is equally important.

While seemingly frivolous or time-consuming, it is oftentimes a good idea to reiterate your feelings or position on an issue. It may appear as if you are being pushy or just repeating what you have already said, but a good partner will pick up on this considerate gesture. At least they will know clearly how you feel.

The greater the clarity of expectations are, the easier it is to smoothly facilitate your daily lives on the road. When both of you are stepping in unison toward a shared destination, the easier the journey.

Sharing the Burden

 

Any great relationship is maintained by both partners equally sharing the tasks of daily life. Cooking, cleaning, financial planning and all the other responsibilities of a ‘normal’ lifestyle exist while traveling. Travel however, bring on an entirely different set of responsibilities. As any relationship progresses each individual tends to fall into certain roles, which they are better suited for. While one partner may excel in discount transportation hunting, the other may find they are best at itinerary preparation and budget planning for their trips.

There are of course those roles that must be co-maintained to one degree or another. A traveling couple would soon find themselves schlepping around the streets (although desirable to some) penniless if they both did not keep track of their finances. A potentially wonderful travel experience could be soured by both, were they not careful to keep the interests of one another in mind while planning activities.

Day Swapping

 

Switching roles is one of the most useful methods for relieving stress while traveling. It has so often saved us from countless potential arguments and turned otherwise harrowing travel days into pleasant experiences. This has never been truer than those days spent while in transit between destinations.

No one wants to arrive in a city after a long day of buses, trains and [hitchhiking] scratching their heads unaware of the location of their hostel. It is easier for one partner to get burned out if day after day they are in charge of the details. Partners should switch roles each day, allowing the other time to recuperate, perhaps to focus on those great pictures for the next excellent article!

This alleviates not only burnout, but allows the other partner an active role in the travel adventure. That is why many of us seek travel - to experience all the delicious sensations these destinations and the paths along the way offer.

Trust the Decisions

 

While learning to actively listen, communicate and share the burdens of travel each partner must honor the decisions made by one another. If all of these tools have been applied and an honest attempt has been made on behalf of each partner, the resulting decision should satisfy both parties. Actively carrying out these decisions thoughtfully is the natural next course of action.

It is one thing to come to a conclusion about the route you will take hitchhiking from Cork to Dublin. It is an entirely different thing to trust your partner’s decision to walk into town to find the bus station they know of after being dropped off in the wrong location in the pouring rain. These are the times which, for better or worse, your relationship will be tested. The knowledge that your concerns and opinions are front and center in your partner’s mind helps solidify trust you have in their judgment.

Make Time for Each Other

 

This tip is really a no brainer, but often enough it gets overlooked. Getting caught up in the excitement of travel, the dregs of planning or the business of blogging can suck up your time and energy. Remember that this person who may be next to you at this very moment is not only your traveling babysitter or business partner, but the object of your love and affection. It can be hard under the circumstances of traveling or otherwise to keep this in mind.

Making the time for one another can be as simple as taking the day off to explore a nearby beach or getting out for a weekend of camping that you might have put off. These are simpler and more affordable options for those on a tight budget. What I personally recommend is a night or two (preferably) at a nice B&B out of town or fancier accommodation. Some times it is well worth the extra money to recharge your mind, body and soul for even more travel experiences.

While not a cure all for the many complications that come when one chooses to wander for extended periods of time, I hope that these tips can serve useful to traveling couples.

Are you a couple who travels together? What are your suggestions or tips for others?

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Dingle, Ireland is as beloved by the Irish as it is by tourists. Four months working in a hostel there left us surprised by how many of our guests were from Limerick, Galway, Cork and Dublin. In my (not-so-scientific) estimation, about half our guests during the summer months were Irish. It’s definitely a lovely town and well-known in its own right, but I suspect one of Dingle’s biggest draws is its staggering number of delightful pubs - a whopping 50, and about 1,900 residents. That’s a pub for every 38 people. Jaysus!

I took it upon myself (for the good of the hostel of course) to embark on a quest to visit each and every pub. I failed, but along that road to failure I picked up many discoveries – the popular, the dives, and the gems. Some will disagree with this list as I didn’t cover every single wonderful pub, and that’s alright with me. Here they are, in no particular order:

 

 

Despite the occasionally-silent or awkward bartender, this place is incredible. Dusty gumboots and other knick-knacks line the walls, with old wood paneling and friendly, intoxicated locals who will burst into song if you are lucky. Dickie Mack’s is also famous for two antique ‘snoogs’ – booths where females had to sequester themselves back before drinking and mingling was couth. On summer weekends it is overrun with large, drunken stag parties from other parts of Ireland who wont’ hesitate to bellow in your ear, fall over incessantly and whatnot. Then again, maybe that’s all part of the charm.

 

 

An Droichead Beag/The Small Bridge

Okay, okay. I know I was tired of The Droichead before I left Dingle, but you likely won’t be spending several months there and it has its own charms. It has two very distinct vibes depending on what time of evening you go. Early evening has a steady (but pleasant) crowd filtering in and out as well as live traditional Irish music. This changes entirely after about 11:30, when the Droichead is the only pub open in town. It quickly transforms (especially on summer weekends) into a freak show of slurred karaoke, hen parties with their once-classy-but-now-trashy attire, rooms so tight you can’t move, and lots of inconsiderate already-drunk men who refuse to queue and shove in front of you while inexplicably proceeding to hit on you. If you enjoy this type of thing (which some genuinely do), head there on a Saturday night and wear your beer-proof clothing.

McCarthy’s Pub

This became my favorite place in town for many reasons. Tom the proprietor is often behind the bar himself, providing interesting conversation and always making guests feel genuinely welcome. All of his staff are the same, making for a surprisingly consistent experience. In cooler months you can sit by the hearth of a large coal fire, and on weekends hear live music from Ireland and beyond for a reasonable cover. The place has a cozy, comforting air about it, even when the house is packed near the end of the night. I recommend this pub highly.

Foxy John’s

Even though I tended toward other pubs, this is one you simply can’t miss. In typical Dingle fashion, Foxy’s is also a hardware store and rents bicycles by day. On the outside it appears to be only a hardware store, which adds to its charm, and the inside is dimly-lit with friendly barmen. A large beer garden and plenty of space, this place makes for a great night.

The Courthouse

Reopened and revamped earlier this year, The Courthouse is the first place I send people looking for traditional Irish music and a relaxing, memorable evening. If you are a tourist on a short visit and are craving outstanding music, this is the place. Every hostel guest I sent here, regardless of their age or preferences, was never let down. Candle-lit tables, quick and warm service and music you won’t soon forget. The only drawback is that most actual Irish people are elsewhere and you will meet many tourists, but that never bothered me – the place is worth it.

Murphy’s Pub

For great local seafood and beer in a lovely atmosphere, this is one of the best options in town. Live music in the evenings makes it a great dinner stop. Excellent customer service here is also a plus.

The Hillgrove

Well, I had to throw in a dive. Open late and Dingle’s only nightclub, this place is full of those already stumbling drunk. Out-of-town Irish flood this place for stags and hens, so if you are eager to see promiscuous girls as well as men in search of said promiscuous girls, this is perfect for you. If you have an ounce or two of class, however, you will go elsewhere. Most of my local friends who head there from time to time will whole-heartedly agree with that statement and would add ‘if you’re headed for the Hillgrove, you’re definitely not sober.’

Now let’s head to Kanon’s Korner chipper and eat, like!

Please note: I simply love Irish people. They are some of the greatest in the world. I realize I may have referenced stag or hen parties in a negative light, but frankly, if there’s one time people are allowed to be truly belligerent, that is the time, and Dingle is full of them come spring and summer. No offense intended.

 

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Walking into the store, I braced for a tongue tangling. The words, if I were lucky, would tumble out not conjugated and without proper enunciation. As I left shrouded in confusion at the event I had just been a part of (in presence only) I realized it had fallen short of even these expectations.

Learning the Mother Tongue

When visiting a country that does not speak your native tongue, I think it is only fitting to put forth an effort learn theirs. This especially holds true when you are, in fact, living in the country for any length of time.

As a native English speaker, I am fortunate that a large portion of the world knows at least a bit of my language. (Thank you, MTV.) This is a fact I am constantly reminded of as the sound of bad American Pop music sprays from the speakers of shops in every country I visit. I don’t rely on this fact to ease the burden of my travels. Instead I see it as a gift, and as such, I should return it in favor.

I have been in Croatia for a little less than a week now. I know the days of the week, how to count to ten and enough sayings to get by for small social interactions for now. Is this sufficient? I can’t say. I do see appreciation on the faces of most store clerks I encounter. Frowns from a few as I butcher my way through their language.

Taking note of both of these reactions I think has been key for me. It has given me appreciation and insight into some misconceptions and truths about non-native speakers integrating into a society.

Cultural Assimilation

Everyone is familiar with the scene at the check-out counter, as we witness the foreigner with the blank look stumble through the entire interaction with the clerk. Each of us have our own reactions and judgments that form in our minds. All too often, myself included, we cast negative judgments and reach unfair conclusions about this individual.

It was not until I myself became this foreigner, or so-called ‘outsider,’ that I fully appreciated this situation. A simple truth - it is never wise to make assumptions or jump to conclusions. The old saying ‘walk a mile in another man’s shoes’ seems appropriate here.

This individual at the check-out may be silent or slow to respond, not for lack of intelligence or effort. They may simply be self-conscious of their proficiency in the language. Perhaps they have not yet learned enough to express themselves fully in a conversation.

During my travels I have encountered non-native English speakers who graciously apologize for their abilities. In some cases, they are as well-spoken and fluid as any native speaker. Yet still for them, a level of conversational comfort keeps them silent all too often.

There is, as always, a flip side to every situation. While some people likely have their own position on this issue, I have mine own as well.

Living vs. Visiting

Living in another society is wholly different from visiting another society. I balk when some travelers ask ‘why should I learn a language when I am only visiting and they already speak mine?’ I understand that position. However, when choosing to stay for longer periods of time and intermingling with this culture, a person must be realistic.

Not only as a sign of respect, but out of necessity and practicality, an honest and heartfelt attempt should be made to become as fluent as possible in their language. It has been mentioned by at least one well-known American travel writer Rick Steves, that there exists in Europe today, a lack of will for immigrants to assimliate into their new cultures. As a New Yorker I can attest that this is a popular, if not correct viewpoint in the United States. Debates rage on, seemingly without end over our border policy with Mexico and the role that Mexican immigrants play in United States society.

This is the crux of the problem, and many who choose to live in a foreign culture bear fault for it. If we view ourselves as superior or believe that we are somehow separate from the societies we live in, we not only deny reality, but in a very real way we sever ourselves from it.

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One of my least favorite things (and something I occasionally wrestle with myself) is dealing with Traveler Ego. This lifestyle more than most is easy to mouth off about, mainly because it isn’t something most people choose. We all know the type. You meet them while volunteering somewhere, in hostel sitting rooms, or in everyday conversations on the streets. The ones who have seen and done it all and just can’t stop talking about how great they are or ‘that one time in undiscovered Western Europe.’

At the beginning of 2011 when we spontaneously up and left, I dealt with my own short - albeit annoying - bout of Traveler Ego. How awesome was I? Leaving my native land in search of cultural exchange, carrying only the contents of a backpack, with no return ticket back home? Surely this is a feat never before undertaken! Wrong.  One would assume that in the travel community - while constantly meeting others on the exact same ‘extreme’ mission - we would obtain a wee-bit-o-humility. Unfortunately, I am discovering this is usually not the case

It does strike me as rather odd that so many of us deal with Mr. Ego in the early stages of our traveling development, when really we have the least amount of information that would actually prove useful. Here is what I feel like saying when, on occasion, someone will not pipe down: Really? You’ve been on the road for two months and are extravagantly boasting about it? I have only been traveling for nine, and am still being blown away by all the creative individuals who have been at it much longer than myself… say two years. Or a decade perhaps.

I really have been showered with opportunities to meet and learn from other travelers. Take Nick, who hitchhiked around Syria last year. Or Pieds Libres, who we are hosting at our flat in Croatia at the moment, on a mission to walk (yes, with their feet) around the globe in a ten year trek. Or Tiphaine, who spent a year driving between Canada, the United States and Mexico in a restored school bus powered by vegetable oil. Now there is a humility trip! You know you have met some incredible individuals when you just aren’t impressed by the average long-term traveler anymore.

It isn’t wrong to be proud of ourselves and recognize we are wonderfully unique in our endeavors. Life on the road is unreal, surprising, even subcultural at times. I just think it is equally (if not more) important to master the art of listening and allowing ourselves to be impressed by others.

If we truly travel to broaden our minds and hearts, our egos need to take the hint and make some room. We really can’t learn much of anything from those we meet along the way if our lips are always moving.

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Behind accommodation and transportation costs, food budgets are perhaps the next greatest expense. While there are ways to lessen the burden on your purse when eating out often, those will not be covered here. Instead we will explore the benefits in frequenting the thrilling world of street vendors and local food markets.

Local Flavor

Aside from the colorful characters that will be found tending the booths, you can always be guaranteed that local flavors and food items will be present. There is nothing quite as satisfying as topping off a great meal with that fresh and locally-produced cheese. Many of these specialty items, that perhaps add the quintessential experience of the region, will not be found in major supermarkets.

The Price is Nice

Depending on the region, there will likely be a bounty of local items helping to drive down price. Many a time those same people running the both will be the producer of those delicious deals. If not so, there is still a good chance that person shares the same roof or genes.

The friendly competition in the market coupled with cutting out the middle man can lead to some deep deals. The spend thrifty traveler would be hard pressed to pass these up.

Fund the neighborHOOD

There is much much to be said about the Slow Food/Money Movements. Supporting these small local businesses keeps the money within these communities - strengthening the surrounding economies, providing jobs and lessening dependence on outside assistance. Statistically, money spent in larger retail stores or supermarkets is exported outside the community to large parent corporations, who have less interest in the health of the communities.

When you spend your hard-earned travel budget, consider passing on this wealth in a more direct way to the producers.

Build Community

Whether your travel plans keep you in a locale for three days or three months, supporting these local food markets helps build communities and fosters relationships. The small independently-run businesses are run by hard-working individuals and families who contribute to their neighborhoods. Often times these vendors have been in business for years and each market place has a unique identity of its own, with owners intimately knowing one other.

You will always reap fringe benefits from interaction with the locals. They know their cities well and can steer you in the direction of often-overlooked attractions. Sometimes they may even point out the affordable, penny-saving restaurants that they themselves frequent. Often far from tourist traps, give a more immersed experience of their culture for you to savor.

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In my recent travels I have been astonished to discover a fear of foreigners to travel to the United States.  While not shared by everyone, this fear is openly expressed by a much greater percentage of people I come across than not.  This attitude seems to be ever more prevalent in the seasoned travelers as well as those of a younger generation.

Perhaps only second to hearing of a reluctance to travel to my country, was hearing the notion that United States citizens neither travel nor hold passports.  While I have a strong opinion on the first, the second topic is something I have very little knowledge of.  Both of these ideas deserve a thorough examination as they impact the impression of the United States abroad as well as give a clue to the forces currently traversing through our society.

Foreign Sentiment

While not initially surprised at the hesitation to enter US borders given the strict security and visa requirements, the outright refusal and paranoia gave me reason to give this a second look.  During my recent time in Ireland I heard from many seasoned travelers who hail from others counties in Europe, yet live, work and raise famlies in the Emerald Isle.  Insights into their recent changes in attitude toward traveling to the US were telling.

Most in their mid 20’s now, had always felt a desire, even until recent years to visit and eventually live in the US.  New York once a dream destination, they now say, given the politics and current economic climate does not hold the same alure to settling down.  This has been much the same response from others we have encountered on the road.

A recent host from Spain expressed great frustration and alienation at the Visa process just to travel to New York for a few months to study English.  Aside from these feelings of resentment for the Visa process we have encountered several people who, while haven gotten to know them personally, still expressed such a disgust or outright fear that they completely refuse to entertain the thought of US travel.  These feelings run so deep that despite a great interest to share in the experience that is the United States, or discover its diversity of people these individuals chose to opt out, usually for South America.  Some research can probably bring clarity to these attitudes and opinions, while lending them either a voice of credibility or unfounded criticism.

How many crossing the Border?

There has been in large part a drastic decline in the percentage of foreign travelers who chose to come onto our shores.  Since 2000 and certainly 2001, post 9/11 and the Patriot Act, there has been a precipitous decline.  In 2000 the United States had an 18 percent share in International Long Haul Tourism, which has dropped to a paltry 12 percent.

While the number of visitors to the United States has increased in recent years,  this is a natural consequence of the surge in international travel.  The United States has not kept up to pace with the rest of the world as a travel destination.  According to a recent report for growth in world tourims in 2011, it has kept up with its 2010 increase despite record decline in 2009.  The United States has shown poorer performance compared to other countries.

Why You No Come to Our Country?

There have been many reasons cited for the decline in interest in travel to the United States.  These have been expressed by many of the travelers and foreign citizens alike during my travels.  Two AlterNet articles highlight interesting perspectives, here and here.  Among some of the reasons and ideas cited are the growing anti-foreigner sentiment of the American populace (thus the renaming of French Fries to Freedom fries under the Bush administration despite a long cherished cultural link between the French and American peoples), increased deportation and surveillance of even documented resident and non-resident aliens as well as illegal working conditions of foreign students by US corporations.

Viewed through a foreign lens the US obsession (according to main stream media) with issues such as the Mosque at Ground Zero (not actually ground zero) as well as religious doctrine entering the theater that is politics only add as a deterrent.  This compounds the already strict visa regulation process, increased background checks and all too frequent invasive security checks upon entering the country.  All too often I am questioned about the American obsession with the right to bear arms.

To which I can only mumble some answer about personal liberties, keeping our government. at bay and keeping the Red Coats in check.  I can only assume that these reasons and images, some valid some not, are enough to keep foreigners from hoping over the Pond.

Do Americans Even Have Passports?

I hear this question over and over again.  The often cited fact that Americans as a people and nation, not only do not travel, but have no interest in the rest of the world.  As always this is a mixed bag.  The answer is ‘Yes’ statistically most Americans do not have passports.   This is however a simplified answer to some amazing trends if examined in more detail.

In recent years the number of Americans obtaining passports has skyrocketed.  In a little over 10 years, from 1996 to 2007 the number of passports being issued has almost more than tripled from 5.5 million to 16.2 million.  Despite the recent decline in 2008 to 2010, mostly due to the financial crisis (probably), the overall trend is still positive.

The number of US passports in circulation has nearly risen exponentially in recent decades as well.  In 22 years from 1989 to 2011 the number of valid passports in circulation has increased 1300%.  Now I don’t have the statistics for comparison to other countries, but that seems like a thirst for the world to me.  So while only 1 in 3 Americans hold a passport, a laughable comparison to Europe, it seems we are making great strides. 

These number are enough for to enlighten my fellow travelers, happened upon locals and neigh sayers of US cultural intelligence.  Now it would seem all that is left is to extend this to our foreign policy.

What We can Learn

As the world becomes more intermingled there are hopes and dangers that the United States should be aware of.  There are two distinct directions that can be plotted for the course into the near future.  One takes the US into an era of cultural stagnation, a fearful gaze onto the world through our border fences and Orwellian security state.  The other takes hold of growing cultural and social Renaissance that is emerging in recent years and months.

If we choose to see a potential enemy in every foreign face, reject fresh or alternate ideas and schools of thought, refuse to offer the olive branch of peace before the jackboot of military intervention we doom ourselves to alienation and world wide irrelevance.  Many a world power and empire has gone down this path before.

There is great potential as there has always been in the American ethos.  And yet I see even more potential now that I can ever point to in my nascent view of history.  If I remember correctly the inscription on the Statue of Liberty (Gift from the French) is:

Give me your tired, your poor,
Your huddled masses, yearning to breath free,
The wretched refuse of your teeming shore,
Send these, the homeless, tempest tossed,
I lift my lamp beside the golden door.

This is something I think is worth shooting for again.  I leave you with the well heeled advice of Rick Steves, a link to his video presentation: Travel as a Political Act.

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First glance upon Ljubljana coming in by train shocked me at the amount of graffiti on the buildings and rail yards.  Not unusual coming into any major metropolitan area by any standard.  Rail yards and the buildings surrounding them are a standard practice grounds for artists and taggers honing their craft.  It was the unusual playfulness in the message conveyed that drew my attention.

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Spent the day sorting apples from the farm.  Don’t know what kind, but they were the biggest I have ever seen in my life!  Also saw about 15 minutes of sun today.  First in about 2 weeks.

 

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